Kyle

kphoto @ 2005-02-19T15:04:00

2005-02-19T21:04:50Z

I’d made a habit of looking in small personal spaces for evidence of his infidelity to my mother. I always knew he was no good, even though everyone else was convinced that he could and would change.

kphoto @ 2005-02-19T15:04:00

2005-02-19T21:04:29Z

kphoto @ 2005-02-19T14:48:00

2005-02-19T20:49:02Z

Her girlfriend had been sleeping with another girl all summer. It was fabulous sex, the kind that just makes you want to have more. They didn’t do much outside of kissing after dinner and eventually making it to the bed after the kissing developed into precarious chair groping.

kphoto @ 2005-02-19T14:48:00

2005-02-19T20:48:40Z

The smell is sweet, cedar, dryer sheets, lavender, lemon, freckled pierced ruffled and fragile, milky. Burrows here and some there, bright and gathered, stretched and waiting.
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Light fingertips rush my sides, the top of hands, elbow, thigh, knee. Knocks a hip bone listens to a bubbled rumble, smooths over wrinkled cotton four days old. Leave me bruises, fossils of your falling here, saliva on the shoulder of my shirts, imprint sheets on my chest and pain when I rise.

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T02:04:00

2004-11-19T07:59:17Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T01:53:00

2004-11-19T07:57:55Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T00:46:00

2004-11-19T06:42:25Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T00:19:00

2004-11-19T06:14:37Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T00:07:00

2004-11-19T06:02:28Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T00:03:00

2004-11-19T05:58:16Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T00:02:00

2004-11-19T05:57:53Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T00:02:00

2004-11-19T05:57:12Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-19T00:01:00

2004-11-19T05:56:42Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-12T12:12:00

2004-11-12T18:12:27Z

kphoto @ 2004-11-12T12:07:00

2004-11-12T18:09:23Z

kphoto @ 2003-11-25T17:41:00

2004-11-07T23:41:36Z

She made it for me. Can she see me? What does she know about what's underneath? She told me to wear it every time she writes.

Fold it in. Do not overbeat. Just until all is moist. Roll and cut.

kphoto @ 2004-11-07T17:32:00

2004-11-07T23:33:37Z

She came over before work one morning. She showed me.

I couldn't say anything. I traced the path and watched her ears. My finger twitched.

We didn't know what to say. Her heartbeat lifted her off the bed.

kphoto @ 2004-11-07T17:29:00

2004-11-07T23:29:56Z

The wood and metal, flat edges and silicone to lick, beaters and blenders, measure, pack, whip.

kphoto @ 2004-11-07T16:01:00

2004-11-07T22:02:04Z

I threw sand at the other girls when we played. I was just jealous. Didn't you know?

When the leaves fell I mashed them with my feet. I walked beside my father and he watched the wind stripping the trees while I caught up.

I say, "Crushed." I say crushed over and over in my head. I pronounce it clearly with points and watery tones. Crushed. C Rush T.

kphoto @ 2004-08-07T15:58:00

2004-11-07T21:59:55Z

It just happened. I never thought....

I liked it.

I started to invite her over. "I was thinking about you all day." I felt them.

They moved over me, slowly... every day. At work, in bed, at meals. They sucked and chewed and I tried to control my breathing.

kphoto @ 2003-03-07T15:36:00

2004-11-07T21:37:05Z

Sometimes I look in the mirror and this is what I see. I also imagine cottage cheese slathered over them, sprinkled with pepper.

Good enough to eat - sweet and tangy, roll it around your teeth and crush the juice out.

It's dangerous. I think about it too much. I think about reaching inside the seams while I sit in my chair. I slowly rock and hope no one notices. Sometimes I put things there to help out.

Put your fingers there. Let them float up. Squeeze my thighs like a harvest in Eden.